Posts tagged Survey

Question:
Okay, I’ve watched the banned PETA Superbowl ad and decided to go vegan so that all those smoking hot babes will jump into the sack with me. I’m sure every man will follow suit and every woman will want to look like that.

But now I get to thinking (since I have a long commute back and forth to work and there is not much else to do but think of future questions for YA!) that if everyone suddenly decided to go vegan all at the same time because one of their ads finally worked like they’re paying them too, what then do we do with the millions of cows and pigs and billions of chickens?

Let them go?

Release them back into the wild? Can we even do that? And what would a wild cow or chicken be like? I’ve never seen a wild chicken. What if they’re vicious? Perhaps they’re too domesticated from generations upon generations of captivity. Therefore they would have to be re-entered into society.

But what would they do? Where would they go? They have no thumbs or even fingers! They would congregate on freeway off ramps holding signs that say….what? They can’t work for food because its cruelty to animals. Chicken’s can’t even sell their eggs because they would be considered abortions. That would be a fine “Happy Easter” now wouldn’t it?! And I sure don’t see them cleaning up after themselves. Think pigeons are a problem? You’re already on a crowded bus and the doors open to let on an
Angus because it wants to go downtown.

Then, will humans set the example for other animals? Will we see a National Geographic special on lions, a pride feasting on a kill when one of them suddenly jerks up and exclaims, “you know, I’m really in the mood for a salad!”. Gazelles yelling, “Hey, getting fat over here! How about a little exercise?”

Oh, wait. never mind. We still need dog and cat food.

Poll: Cardinals or Steelers?